It's been an amazing month of love
and companionship. It's also been a time to appreciate and nurture the relationships
in our lives. This transcends our romantic relationships to include relationships with friends and family; people we interact and share experiences
with every day.
Firstly it's important to
recognise that each relationship in our lives has a purpose. There is a
reason why we meet certain people at certain times. Therefore, it will be
foolhardy to take anyone for granted or treat relationships with disdain.
Everyone has something to offer and something that they need. There may be
something you can give or receive that will make a positive impact.
Secondly, to get the best out of
anything, it is important to nurture it. A seed does not grow into a plant or flowers
without nurture and nourishment. Your relationships need your time, care and
investment. The true meaning of friendship is someone who is there in times of
need. This goes beyond distance or the number of physical meetings. Be there for
the people in your life; otherwise, your relationships will soon die out. It is
how rich the nourishment you give to your relationship is, that will determine
the value you derive from it.
Thirdly, realise that like
everything under the sun, there is a time and season for relationships. There
will be certain times when we experience peaks in our relationships with
certain individuals and we may be surprised that things change after a few
years. There are relationships that are predestined to be for a short span. We
will give ourselves unnecessary problems when we fight to drag these on especially
when the enthusiasm is not mutual. People evolve, and not everyone or
everything evolves with them. This does not mean that you should cut people off
when your circumstances change. It just means that you should accept that a
relationship may be intense for a period to meet a particular purpose according
to the phases you both are in at that point in time. It still possible for this
to go back up again but until such a time, choose to maintain contact as much as
you can. An occasional call or text just to say hello and check on them is
great as this will let them know that you are still there, even if you don't
see as much as you used to.
Lastly, accept that true friendship transcends time and distance; so don't turn the lights off on some relationships simply because you have
not heard from people in a while. It's easy to take offence at people because
you have not gotten a call in years. The truth of the matter is that everyone
has issues that they face and until you speak to them, you may never know what
they are going through. Such persons may have more responsibility now than they
did when you were closer. They may be going through a phase or just trying to
get their lives in order. If you cut them off because it appears that they have
distanced themselves, then you may lose the opportunity for the relationships to blossom again tomorrow. Nevertheless, if you try to reach out consistently
and are blown off by them, don't let it discourage you. Be satisfied that
you tried consistently to reach out. If the relationships are meant to blossom
again in future, the circumstances of your lives will align so that they will.
Till then, remember your friends when they were at their best, and for the impact that you were able to make in each
other's lives and together.
It's easy to get so caught up in
our own circumstances that we forget people who have been dear to us over the years. Try to reach out to some old friends and just catch up. Don't be
discouraged even if you get an awkward response. Update each other on how you
have been and offer encouragement. Don't ignore that voice in your spirit
prompting you to say hello to someone. You never know if this will be your last
opportunity to do so.
I'm dialing some
numbers on my phone right now. I'm typing some messages too. For any old
friends reading this, know that I still care for you.
Yours truly,
LAWAfolabi
© LAW Afolabi, February 2018
